Something new: THE LUMBERFOX!

Big breath.

Here we go.

As of, oh… about ten minutes ago, I am a HYBRID AUTHOR.

Please use only non-ethanol gas and plug me in every night for maximum mileage.

You can now by my first self-published (under a geeky pseudonym) story, a geekrotic romance called...

THE LUMBERFOX.

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Here's the blurb:

Caught in Atlanta's Snowjam 2014, self-confessed geek Tara is rear-ended by the hottest guy she's ever met. Ryon is a beer brewer and restauranteur who fits the bill of what Tara and her friends call a "lumberfox": sartorial lumberjack style, cultivated facial hair, tattoos, and specialized tastes. When he invites Tara to spend the snowstorm in his nearby condo, she takes a gamble and slogs through the Hothlike blizzard, where she learns that a man who takes that much time with his mustache knows exactly what to do with his mouth.

Here are 10 reasons to buy it:

1. It's 42 pages long. Because geek.

2. The safe word is Wookiee.

3. It includes such references as go se, tauntauns, Mr. Darcy, Scott Pilgrim, and Labyrinth.

4. It's hella sexy.

5. It's the first time anyone's ever seen me use the P and C words.

6. I didn't use words like TURGID, TUMESCENT, PERT, or THROBBING, PURPLE-HEADED, SPURTIN' SPARTAN WARRIOR.

7. Because I'd like to write two more of these stories about new kinds of sexy geeks having sexy geek sex. Level 2 will be THE SUPERFOX (a super hero and comic book geek who wears a kilt and knows what to do with the Lasso of Truth) and THE DAPPERFOX (about a gumbo aficionado with a bow tie collection who knows a thing or two about vinyl).

8. Because I really want to challenge anyone who thinks that geeks aren't sexy or that geek girls are fake or that beards can't be hawt.

9. Because it'll make me ridiculously happy, especially if you leave a review on Amazon or tweet a #sixwordreview on Twitter.

10. Because it'll perk you up, make you smile, make you giggle, and possibly encourage you to liven up your love life or find a Han Solo of your own.

I hope you'll read it, and I hope you'll review it, and I hope you'll tell your friends.

Live long, prosper, and read smut, my friends!